Mistaken

Lee has truly hit rock bottom. I feel sick to my stomach while reading because her suffering is so palpable. I want to pity Lee because she has been taken advantage of in so many ways but I can't really because she let it happen. Beginning with Cross,

he started to visit Lee less and less. She has heard rumors that he is seeing another girl named Melodie, but she does not want to believe it. Instead of seeing this as an opportunity to dump his a** she is desperate to see him. After 6 weeks of his absence, Lee goes looking for him.

Now, in real life, I would hate a guy like this. He uses Lee and she's too in love with him to care. I'd think that Lee was pathetic and should get over herself. However, this book has changed my mind a little. I would despise a guy like Cross in real life but I can't actually hate Cross in the novel. Lee has brainwashed me into thinking that he doesn't mean to hurt her and that eventually he will take her as his girlfriend. I know this thinking isn't logical, but I can understand Lee's feelings so well that I understand why she doesn't leave. Her entire happiness revolves around Cross and she doesn't know how to change, nor does she want to. I can now understand why girls stay in unhealthy relationships. They depend on these men to fill a void in themselves. In Lee's case, Cross is much higher on the social totum pole at Ault. She does not believe she is worthy of Cross, so she accepts his poor treatment of her as part of the deal.  Trying to explain Lee's emotions and this relationship is very difficult. (It's like when you try to explain something to someone and you know they're not understanding it the way that you want them to. They are getting the wrong idea but you have no idea how to change it.) The only way to completely understand this story is to read it. I recommend this book to anyone.

When Lee goes looking for Cross she encounters Cross' roommate instead and he obviously knows about the secret affair. I'm realizing that though she says she wants the relationship to stay hidden, she secretly wants people to know. At Ault, being with Cross is looked highly upon and she wants people to know that she is good enough to keep his attention.
Lee eventually finds Cross and asks him why he was ever with her. I won't disclose what is said, so if you want to know read the book! Lee's relationship with Cross is the major conflict in the story and I hate giving away the ending.

Lee is also taken advantage of my a reporter for the New York Times. Lee makes the mistake of disclosing personal information to the reporter and she uses it to construct an article depicting the unhappiness and discrimination found in boarding school. Lee feels betrayed by this woman because she understood how Lee felt and took advantage of that link. The other people at Ault (i.e. teachers, students, the principal) view Lee as a traitor. She barricades herself in er dorm room and the library to hide from the disapproving eyes of these people.
Lee is at the bottom of the bottom. Even her best friend doesn't understand. Martha can only try to comfort Lee. A quote from Le Petit Prince (The Little Prince) by Saint Exupery perfectly describes this situation. The phrase states that "It's very mysterious the land of tears." No one can truly understand another's emotions.

"C'est tellement mysterieux, le pays des larmes."